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The first day at day care is a big one for all concerned mum, child and carer. It is exciting and terrifying at the same time. Here are a few tips on how best to prepare all of you for the big day and help make that transition a smooth one.

Mom - Start gently preparing your child in advance, mentioning what a great adventure day care will be with lots of friends and games. Keep it low key though do not overdo it as this could overwhelm your child. Provider - You could provide mom with the first names of children and carers at the day care and suggest role playing with dolls so everything is not completely strange on that first day.

Mom should try to foster independence in the weeks preceding with visits to friends and providing activities the child will encounter at the day care and providers should be sure to encourage mom and child to visit the day care a couple of times before starting in order to allow the child to absorb the environment.

Mom should be sure to have everything packed for the day e.g. snacks, change of clothes, comfort toys and ensure everything is labeled. Be sure and have monies paid and forms completed before the big day so you are not distracted by these tasks. Have lots of time to get ready the morning of the big day with a good breakfast and some talk about the great adventure ahead. Carers should have an extra person on hand when a new child is starting so that one person can focus on distracting and comforting the new child. It is also advisable to have the child start at a time when everyone is settled into their morning activities. I wouldn't recommend first thing in the morning when the flurry of activity could be upsetting for the new child.

Mom, let your child help pack his bag (comfort toys, change of clothes, snacks) and when you get to the day care, walk him in do not carry him. Providers should request this of all parents, it makes the separation easier plus is a big part of kids becoming independent.

All day cares should have a settling in period where the child will stay for gradually longer periods of time. it is crucial you facilitate mom to be in the background. This is where mom needs to take a back seat and observe rather than interact. Let the child move at his own pace, be it observing quietly or playing alone, sometimes the child may just wish to sit on a sofa and take it all in. When mom leaves, distract the child immediately by ushering them off to some exciting activity.

Settling in is the time for mom to be there but not be there... Mom should be in the background providing fairly silent support. Allow your child to absorb his new surroundings. Gauge his reactions by stepping out of the room momentarily, explain that you are making a phone call and are just in the hall. Eventually, you will sit in your car or get a coffee as your child settles down. When that time comes say, bye mom will see you later, positively with a quick kiss and leave the room. If your child cries do not look back. They will be distracted and will stop crying shortly.

This drop off and settling in routine is crucial and should be in place from day one. The communication and understanding between parents and providers will ensure an enjoyable transition for both child and mom. Now, moms can relax for a few hours and providers can enjoy the new little character in their day care!!