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The first day at day care is looming and it is a scary and challenging prospect for mom and provider alike. But, never fear, I have compiled the First Day Survival Guide for all concerned.

This is a team effort with Mom laying the groundwork by gently preparing the child with talk of how much fun day care will be. The provider can be suggesting role playing at home, perhaps providing mom with names of kids and carers to facilitate that familiarization.

Moms should allow the child to help pack and carry their bags. When you arrive at the day care, walk your child to the door holding his hand, do not carry him. Carrying the child will make the transition considerably harder for all concerned.

One of the providers policies should be a settling in routine where mom and child pay several visits to the day care in the weeks preceding the first day. Mom should become familiar with the routines of the day care and begin implementing them at home plus fostering independence by arranging visits to other kids homes.

Allow the child to help pack his bag and carry it. When you arrive at the day care walk your child in holding his hand, do not carry him. Providers should insist on this therefore avoiding the peeling child off the parent scenario.

All day cares should have a settling in period where the child will stay for gradually longer periods of time. Facilitate the moms so they can be around but discourage too much mom involvement. This is where mom needs to take a back seat and observe rather than interact. Provide one on one support for the child. He may just want to sit and observe for a while eventually venturing into a group to participate or play alone with a toy. Let him go at his own pace. When mom leaves, distract him immediately by ushering him off to some exciting activity.

Mom,the first day of settling in you will probably stay in the room, allowing your child to do his own thing but remaining in sight. Gauge his reactions by stepping out of the room momentarily, explain that you are making a phone call and are just in the hall. Allow the staff to distract your child and observe from a distance (obviously, do not let him see you). When the time comes for you to sit in the car or go for a coffee say, bye mom will see you later, positively and with a quick kiss then leave the room. If your child cries do not look back, once you are out of sight the child will stop crying shortly and will be distracted by play and activities.

This drop off and settling in routine is crucial and should be in place from day one. The communication and understanding between parents and providers will ensure an enjoyable transition for both child and mom. Now, moms can relax for a few hours and providers can enjoy the new little character in their day care!!